I should really feel lucky

 I passed my 350th day of being locked out of the teaching studio.  Will we be back by fall?

Mostly I have just been feeling sorry for myself.  I kept putting off doing a post, because I was waiting to get some new pictures.  Now I find that I can not get the computer to download from my camera and then I get discouraged and don't work on it to figure it out.  I have seen this discouragement in so much of what is happening to me now.

I hear of so many weaver's and artists that have been working and blooming in the lockdown/quarantine/covid time, but I am not able to really function.  I just do a lot of sitting, I read a lot of simple fiction and I stare at the phone screen youtube/video/etc and am not completing anything.  

I should be feeling lucky.  I have a nice home to stay in, enough money to eat well and a couple of people to share this space with so that I am not alone.  I know that there are many around that do not have the basic necessities that I do.  But I still am not able to move from the cocoon stage to the butterfly.  I am waiting for the change to happen, or for me to get it together and make it happen.

At the first of the close down, I spent more time sleeping and reading.  (I think there were more than a few days that I did not even get out of bed.)  I saw my doctor last summer and that seemed to help, but doing much creative is still a stretch.  I have been following an on line course and only able to partly do the work.  (I need to get it together and make it happen.) 

 This month I have one class coming to a close and another starting, plus I am doing another video for Curious Mondo at the end of the month and I need to organize for that.  The class is using space dyed yarns for a faux ikat design.  I did these two shawls some years back when I was playing with this idea.

 These were my final projects in the self study.  The top one for a friend and the bottom one for me.  I wrote about them some years back.  My shawl is wool and silk and is very nice to wear and can fold up to a small package, so I took it traveling with me (remember traveling?) when I went to Europe.  It added that additional layer to help keep me warm.  My sister uses scarves for this layer of warmth and always looks so good.  I have a ton of scarves, can I start wearing them more often?  (I should, I just need to get it together and make it happen.)

I think just sitting is not allowing my body to work at it's best.  I got a little pedal machine for my birthday and so I sit and pedal (like a recumbent bicycle) for about 30 minutes a day (most days).  This is a good start, but I need to get more active so that I can enjoy this life.  I know that on the days that I weave, I always feel better.  But right now I have a bunch of empty looms and just vague plans of what I want to put on them.  Well not so vague in the case of the class that starts in a couple of weeks.  But to read the pattern, I need to reload Fiberworks on my computer.

Yes, along with the computer forgetting how to load pictures from my camera, it also lost some programs.  When we upgraded to windows 10 and loaded a new version of office, several programs disappeared.  I already have a message from Fiberworks on how to get me going and an offer from a friend to help me get going on the program.  I am not a dummy, I should be able to understand and work on that program.  (I just need to get it together and make it happen!)